Guys are like public washrooms, either taken or full of shit!

The only man a girl can depend on is her daddy.

Here comes a problem...on two legs...with a Y chromzone...

We don't devote enough scientific research into finding a cure for jerks." -Calvin and Hobbes

"I wish my mom would have told me the same thing about guys as she did about horror movies... don't worry, they're all fake."

Love is like Tug-of-war, one jerk after another."

"Boy are immature, guys are jerks, men are rare."

"If God had wanted women to chase men, he would have made the men worth catching."

"Guys are like roller coasters, either they make you sick or give you the biggest thrill of your life."

"There are easier things in life than finding a good man.... nailing Jell-o to a tree for instance."

"Guys are like yellow Starbursts, they look good from the outside but when you get a little deeper, they make you want to throw up."

"Men should be like tissue: soft, strong and disposable." -Miss White "Clue"

"All men are shallow." -Teen Angel

"Men are stupid. If you forget, they will remind you."

"No woman ever falls in love with a man unless she has a better opinion of him than he deserves."

"It must be awful being a girl. I'm sure its frustrating knowing that men are bigger, stronger, and better at abstract thought than women. Really, if your a girl, what would make you want to go on living? --Calvin

"The thought of a jerk like you begging one of us for a date when your 17!"

"A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle." -Gloria Steinem

"The perfect man is like the Lochness Monster... they say he exists but no one's ever seen him!"

"If we can send one man to the moon, why can't we send them all there?"

"Whatever women do, they must do twice as well as men, to be thought
half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult."

"Men are like fish.. neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut."

"Men are living proof that women can take a joke!"

"I think, therefore I am single."

"Give a guy enough rope and he will soon make a jackass out of himself."

"Men are terrible.. they will ruin your life, mark my words." -Steel Magnolias

"Boys are immature, guys are jerks, men are rare."

"Mr. Right's coming.. but he's in Africa and he's walking!" -Oprah

"God created man before woman because you always need a rough draft."

"Everyone keeps telling me that the right guy will come along. I think mine got hit by a truck."

"Woman are crazy. Men are stupid. Women are crazy because men are stupid."

"Men are like parking spaces, all the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped."

"I want a guy that's sensitive and caring, and that loves cats. Unfortunately, most guys like that are gay."

"What's the difference between the IQ of a stupid guy and one of a mosquito? About 5 points. How do you even the score? Kill the mosquito."

"The more guys I meet, the more I like snakes.